Template for improved family & self care
The World According to Neal (1-2-32) provides a template for improved family & self care. Please look through earlier posts for an expansion on each of the “3s.” If you thought it helpful to others, please copy and share my 1-2-32.
1) GOAL: To improve self-care (also known as “taking good care of ourselves”). Defined as:
- having a good time (“to enjoy myself” is my favorite action)
- improving our understanding of how our feelings affect our actions
- improving our understanding of how our feelings and actions affect another
- improving our understanding of how another’s feelings and actions affect us
- identifying and sharing how we feel with those that care about us
2) We have two primary sources of power (to have things the way we want):
- Knowing how good we are.
- Keeping agreements with ourselves and with others.
31: Improve my ability to notice, remember and repeat my own good work. What we notice, we can remember. What we remember, we can repeat. Developing an understanding and awareness of our basic needs will contribute to developing and tapping our two primary sources of power (to have things the way we want) that will result in improved self-care.
32: We have three basic needs. We need to feel respected, recognized, and appreciated.
Respect– the acknowledgement of (I am)
Recognition– the identification of (I am Neal)
Appreciation– the valuation of (I am Neal. I am good.)
- Treat others as I wish them to treat me, but I am not holding my breath. (Golden Rule)
- Treat myself as I wish others to treat me. (Platinum Rule) [Or: I deserve to be treated well. That includes how I treat MYSELF!]
- Be true to myself.
Only when I do unto others, as I want them to do unto me can I ask them to do unto me in the same fashion. However, while I can ask I cannot expect. That is what I mean by “not holding my breath.” And the better I get at following the first two rules, the better I will understand what it means to be true to myself.
Think of “I” as the seat on a three-legged stool. Think of the 32 (3×3) as the three legs of the stool.
We support ourselves as our respect, recognition and appreciation for ourselves grow.
We support ourselves by noticing, remembering and repeating our good work.
We support ourselves through the practice of the Golden Rule, the Platinum Rule and being true to ourselves.
Copyright © 2015 by Neal A. Hemmelstein
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